its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Randomize
