My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
