Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
