rhymes with "ouble enetration"
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Just invented taco cereal.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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