I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
