Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
she looked like the before picture.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize
