You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Just puked most of my soul out..
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize