WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize