She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
