Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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