i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
