No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
