Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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