I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
