I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
