It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Randomize
