Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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