You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
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