I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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