well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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