No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
