Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
You ate ashes out of my bong
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
