if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
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