No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
