dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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