Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Randomize