Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
