how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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