did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
