if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
3 2 1 whiskey
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize