YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
This is the high leading the old right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize