i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
