At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
