Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
