Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize