And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
