When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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