the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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