she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
