Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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