how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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