Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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