Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
