Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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