And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
pop tarts are not kleenex
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
