Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
