woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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