There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
