Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
