we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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