I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
